i'm going off

hey peeps just a short update... yah i am ok... thxs for those who called... anyway was busying packing my stuffs just now... cos going for my hostel camp tomolo... the last camp before school commence... it will be a 6 days camp so i won't be around till sunday... so excited now... u all really cannot imagine the amount of stuffs i am going to bring tomolo... 2 large bags... oh boy i am getting stronger... lolx... oh ya going to spend one night at sentosa... think it will gonna be fun... and also the amount of mozzies that will suck my blood... darn it... and also the island wide puzzle competition... just thinking of all the travelling here and there i gonna have is driving me crazy liao... hehe... anyway i gonna bath and sleep early liao cos got to wake up at 5am tomolo to catch the early train... see ya peeps... will update again when i come back lah... miss ya...

caren - oei nu ren u going to send simi sai to my place? don't send when i having camp leh...

xiao de - must miss me hor... don't anyanyhow flirt with others hor...

:) - must ganbatte and take care... and ur menses is coming le... haha... yah i know i am bad... so?

this smile i wear

i sit here...

thinking of you...

thinking about the memories we shared...

i miss them & i miss you...

since the moment you said goodbye...

i haven't been the same...

something's been missing...

it's my smile...

people began to feel sorry for me...

they would be afraid to laugh...

their smiles began to fade along with mine...

so, now this smile i wear...

i wear it everyday...

taking it off only...

when i'm in my room at night...

then i let it all out...

my pillow is wet from the tears...

i lie there until i fall asleep...

i just need you to hold me tight...

i need to hear you say...

those sweet words to me once more...

so i can take you in my arms...

& hold onto you forever...

i wish i could just leave...

the fake smile at home...

so they would all realise...

my suffering isn't over...

my heart is still broken...

into a million pieces...

at the bottom of my soul...

i wish they knew...

so i could have some comfort...

so they could tell me...

it's going to be alright...

my life without you...

has been so unbearable to live...

& i hate every second i breathe...

because it just proves...

i can live without you...

only God knows...

how much i miss you...

he only knows how much i cry...

with every tear that falls...

my heart gets weaker...

& my hope for "us" fades...

i had so much faith in our love...

i thought that it alone...

could get us through anything...

people say time heals the hurt...

but if they lost someone like you...

they would know it isn't true...

you tried to tell me things would get easier...

with everyday that goes by...

i hate it when i get asked...

how we're doing...

i hate to disappoint them...

& tell them...

we exist no longer...

please tell me this isn't what you wanted...

please tell me what i feel is real...

goodbyes don't have to last forever...

because i know...

we were meant to be together...

rule of sale

wow finally got back... phew... carried many stuffs... my mum was shocked when she saw the amount of bags i brought into the house... went shopping with john today... i bought many many clothes & pants... but that stupid john only bought one shirt only... its like he accompany me to shop shop shop only... paiseh ah... & i like spent around $200 plus liao... shopping is damn fun especially when u r buying things u like & not the one paying... thxs to my dear parents... love ya all so much... muah... & "fighting" & pushing around with aunties in a sale is definitely a "fantastic" experience... i swear i won't lose out the second time aunties... grrr.... i gotta learn to be like them... the few rules to win in a sale...

1.) throw ur image away
2.) give ur opponents cold-hard-stares
3.) be as rough as possible

most importantly

4.) have big breasts cos with bigger breasts u can perform better... example. during the "fighting" of the clothes when u swing hard u might indirectly hit ur opponents with the breasts... thus that might stop their actions for a while... hehe...

sadly i can only fulfill the first 3 rules...

Glay - Winter Again

mukuchi na hito iki wa shiroku
     the silent masses, breaths of white
rekishi no fukai te ni hikarete
     drawn in by the wide hand of history
osanai hi no kaerimichi
     the way home from our young days
rin to naru yukiji wo isogu
     as the cold rings out, we hurry down the snowy road
gaitou no shita hira hira to
     beneath the street lamps, lightly
kogoeru hoho ni maichiru yuki
     the snow falls dancing down my freezing cheek
me wo tojireba mukashi no mama
     when I close my eyes from long ago
kibishiku mo hibi tsuyoku ikiteru mono yo
     i see people who lived strongly during those strict days

itsuka futari de yukitai ne
     someday, i'd like to go with you
yuki ga tsumoru goro ni
     when the snow is piling up
umareta machi no ano shirosa wo
     the whiteness of the town that i was born in
anata ni mo misetai
     i'd like to show it to you
aitai kara koishikute
     because i miss you, i love you
anata wo omou hodo
     so much that i think of you
samui yoru wa mada mune no oku
     that cold night, it's still in my heart
kane no ne ga kikoeru
     i can hear the sound of the bells

noshikakaru kumo wo miagete
     looking up at the overhanging clouds
toki no hayasa no nagare ni tou
     i question the flow of the speed of time
daremo ga idaku kanashimi no
     for the sadness that everyone embraces?
shuuchaku eki wa doko ni aru no ka
     where is the last train
hidamari kureru sakamichi de
     lying in the sun, on the darkening uphill road
wakasa no maboroshi to deai
     i meet with the phantom of my youth
"genki desu" no hitokoto ni
     more than the memories stirred by "i'm doing fine"
natsukashisa yori mo tomadoi tachidomaru
     the confusion makes me stop suddenly

sugisarishi yo ni yureru hana
     the flower that sways as time passes in the world
tooku wo mitsumeteta
     from far away, i watched it
tsumetai kaze ni sarasareta
     i was exposed to the cold wind
ai wa ano hi kara ugokenai to
     since that day, love couldn't move
aitai kara aenai yoru ni wa
     on the nights when i can't see you
anata wo omou hodo
     so much that i think of you
omoide ni wa futari ga aruita
     in my memories we walked together
ashiato wo nokoshite
     the footsteps of the path we walked still remains

furitsuzuku shiroi yuki wa kokoro moyou sotto
     the white snow which continues to fall softly forms a heart-shaped
toutou to shiroi yuki wa
     the completely white snow
mujou naru hito no yo wo
     so that the world of unsure people
subete yurusu you ni furitsuzuite yuku
     can be forgiven, continues to fall

itsuka futari de yukitai ne
     someday, i'd like to go with you
yuki ga tsumoru goro ni
     when the snow is piling up
umareta machi no ano shirosa wo
     the whiteness of the town that i was born in
anata ni mo misetai
     i'd like to show it to you
aitai kara koishikute
     because i miss you, i love you
anata wo omou hodo
     so much that i think of you
samui yoru wa mada mune no oku
     that cold night, it's still in my heart
kane no ne ga kikoeru
     i can hear the sound of the bells
aitai kara aenai yoru ni wa
     on the nights when i can't see you
anata wo omou hodo
     so much that i think of you
omoide ni wa futari ga aruita
     in my memories we walked together
ashiato wo nokoshite
     the footsteps of the path we walked still remains

tsukareta...

wow again me the last one to get back... thxs for the cab... haha me been training hard for basketball... i love my fencing too lah... hehe... finally got my hostel allocation today... i am staying in hall 8... pple tell me i will be famous in hall 8... why? cos i crap like nobody business mah... haha xiao junjun is my roomate... so cool rite... haha i loved calling u that... and the sad thing is the course structure gonna change a bit... haiz need to go for the briefing then i won't be so blur... seriously i am damn blur and seh now... seh seh seh... must sleep after my maggi... a hungry man is dangerous cos he will make a mess of the kitchen...

xiao de: sori didn't keep my promise supposed to watch movie with u... cos i was tied up with some stuffs...

finally it's all over...

finally some updates from me... haha... went to collect my japanese results yesterday... is my last level and i will be moving on to advance level... will be getting my cert next week... anyway bad and good news lor...

good news is i scored 86 marks this time round, and my average for 8 papers is 93... although not wat i expected but i shld be thankful cos wat to expect for a 1 day mugging on 50 chapters... i can't believe i did it... anyway the paper is really difficult maybe bcos its the last paper, first time i find it challenging... tricky in this sense... i sat thru the whole paper, first time i did not leave the room early...

now for the bad news, since i have passed all the requirements i am now able to promote to the advance level... but god knows the schedule for my uni timetable... i won't get it till the 25th... so i can't register just yet...

next, even if my schedule permits i also not sure whether i shld register... i am contradicting rite? bcos i have my fencing, archery, basketball training and maybe a stupid club... why all the other hostel students so on... why can't they slack abit, then i can also slack... damnit...

sori ah bloggy always an avenue for me to vent my frustrations... always tahan-ing my huge amount of vulgarities... nah give u a muack to make up to u lah...

anyway last sunday finally able to find time to help carol fix her computer... i went out during noon but only able to see the PC at 7pm... why leh? cos when i met her she was having gathering with her frens so i just tagged along lor... go crystal jade to meet them eat lunch... ai seh when i saw them its all girls sia... a total of 8 girls... and i am the only guy lor... u all shld know i very SHY wan wat... so i just eat and never talk much... the best part is i didn't pay a cent... cos the girls treated me...

next i thot can go repair computer liao but no they have more plans, go KTV... kaoz i like within one month got ard 10 times KTV liao... i "lost voice" le... hehe... then proceed to party world for KTV... then i damn paiseh during one moment... they ordered beer and stout... and ask me drink but i say i don't want... then they asked why? then si carol go say he scare he will "anyhow anyhow" when he drunk... diaoz lor... (-_-''')

lolx anyway had fun lah, and also the best part i didn't pay a cent again... carol treated me... thxs ah... then reached her place around 7pm to fix the computer...